Takuto's Reflection
by TakutoXXX
Summary: This is a monologue that I wrote of Takuto Kira talking to himself about his true feelings for Mitsuki and how he thinks of her. There may be a few japanese words in here but you might understand them as you read the whole thing. Hope you enjoy this! D


"_**Takuto's Reflection"**_

_Monologue by Takuto Kira_

_Takuto is sitting, cross-legged in the air, on Mitsuki's roof, looking up at the quarter moon with numerous stars scattered in the sapphire sky. He thinks about the memories he has had with Mitsuki ever since he met her, but mostly flashbacks on many times Mitsuki mentions her first love, Eichi Sakurai. His hands turn into fists and his eyes close tightly to hold his jealousy inside until he opens them in defeat and fury. "DAMMIT!!" He slams fists on the roof tiles as they shatter out of their place._

_Takuto pants out of his hard anger that he just demonstrated, later eases his shoulders down slowly.….. "Why is Eichi the first person that pops in her mind? Does she "have" to talk about him all the time? Why does she have to talk about him around "me"? Doesn't she know by now that that name always pisses me off?! God, she is possessed over Eichi, Eichi, Eichi!! Mitsuki never thinks about anyone she cares about, besides him. Everyone helped her fulfill her dreams: Ooshige-san, Wakaoji-sensei, Takasu-san, Meroko…..even ME!!"...Suddenly a thought flashes in his mind.…."Yeah"….He places hand on his chest. "I helped her! I made it possible for her to become famous! I was the one who turned her into a 16 year old and she passed the audition because of me! Without me, Mitsuki would never have been known by many people around the world and she wouldn't have to suffer with the tumor in her throat. (sighs) And besides, without me and Meroko,………Mitsuki wouldn't have known that she has only one year to live." He looks down at himself. "Why couldn't she remember all of the things I've done for her? All of her gratitude that she gave me,…she said them so lightly that she wanted Eichi to get all her gratitude more than me. She thinks that Eichi is the reason why she is becoming a singer." He closes eyes lightly. " That's where her heart lies on. 'Him.'…..Ridiculous!"_

_Takuto stands on his feet, continues to look at the moon, how it symbolizes Mitsuki and her beautiful voice of song. "Mitsuki……do you know if I'm even "here" with you? Do you even know "why" I'm doing this for you? I want you to live, Mitsuki. To breath, to make your dreams continue to grow. Why can't you see-……why can't yo-……." He sighs and looks down. "You-…….You never care about yourself. ……You don't always look inside you and express your true feelings by your own inspiration. And it is not Eichi, Mitsuki….and it is not some promise to become a singer because he said so……That is not how it works.……Your inspiration is….well,……you!...You want to sing because you are alive! That is what matters. This promise you made to him is like giving you a forceful dream! Mitsuki, you fool! Your voice came from yourself, not from Eichi. Because you live, you grow! Like an everlasting rose……and….you shine….like a full moon……And Mitsuki, you ARE Fullmoon!...demo…. you are never going to be like the full moon if you keep shining your dreams on some guy you love! You have to shine on yourself!" Takuto's eyes are wide open, has never blinked while he was talking; the moonlight keeps his eyes blind and focuses on his true feelings for his dear Mitsuki. "Mitsuki………when-………" Takuto has a prediction of what will happen as he speaks this, but does not care. "When I was a singer just like you,……I never wanted to sing because I promised someone. I was born with the gift of music. The more my voice grew stronger inside me, the more I believed in myself. You don't know how my dreams became a miracle! My voice brightened so much that it brought such amazing sound in the microphone." Tears start to fill his eyes halfway, shouts out. "IT WAS MY VOICE, MITSUKI!! MY VOICE!! NOBODY ELSE'S!! MY DREAMS CAME FROM MY HEART!!" He stops and hears nothing but silence, expects Mitsuki to respond back to him, but no voice is heard. Takuto opens his eyes and notices that the quarter moon suddenly turned into a full moon, but it was larger than the first time.……"Wha-?" His eyes widen in surprise, wonders if the moon really did hear him and it opened its beautiful, pale- yellow beam down on him as if it truly understands him. Takuto feels so comforted by its presence, closes his eyes, wraps arms around himself to keep his warm comfort from escaping him. "Mitsuki………………."…Takuto feels Mitsuki's light surround his whole body and his angelic voice of music starts to rise higher and higher up his throat and passes through his soft lips. _

"_Kimi wo suki ni natte Dorekurai tatsu no kana? _

_Kimochi Fukurande yuku bakari de……..Kimi wa Kono omoi kidzuiteiru no kana?_

_Ichido mo kotoba ni wa Shitenai kedo_

_Yuki no youni Tada shizukani…………..Furitsumori Tsudzukete yuku…………_

_Hold me tight Konna omoi nara……Dareka wo suki ni naru kimochi……Shiritaku Nakatta yo_

_I love you Namida tomaranai……………………..Konnan ja Kimi no koto_

_Shirazuni ireba Yokatta yo-"_

_Takuto's voice suddenly breaks and feels a sharp pain deep inside his stomach. "AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" He holds his arms to his stomach and winces tightly.….."Oh, God, no! Not agai-…." The pain rapidly rises up his spine and into his mind as the memories of his past flood back to him, of when he was named "Takuto Kira" and when he was the main singer in the band, "Route L" with Wakaoji and Mitsuki's father, Aoi. "NOOO!!!" He groans loudly and holds his hands on his head to pressure the pain out of him. "Stop it!! I forgot it!! I forgot it all!! I'm sorry that I remembered! I'm sorry!…..Just LEAVE ME ALONE!!!" As his anger ascends, more pain grows upon him. "AHHHHH!!!! GOD DAMMIT!! LEAVE ME ALONE!!!" Suddenly a sharp sting erupts in his throat, like a knife making a bloody cut through his esophagus, while he was yelling and stressing his voice so much. "GAAAHH!!!" Takuto collapses flat on the rooftop and grasps his throat, coughing violently. "What the-?...Why do I feel this pain in my-…." Takuto's eyes widen, as the memory passes through him. "……….That's right……I-….I had a tumor….when I was a singer…" A flashback shows of him singing, but breaks the song as his tumor first occurred.……"…(coughs) .and….Wakaoji-sensei operating me…" It shows flashback of Wakaoji doing surgery on Takuto's throat.…"and I-……I drove off a cliff…"..A flashback appears when Takuto drove off a cliff in his motorcycle. He suddenly begins to yell in the same tone of when he committed suicide.……"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!…STOP IT!!! STOP IT!!! I didn't want to die!!!! I DIDN'T WANT TO DIE!!! I DIDN'T DESERVE THIS!!" Takuto starts to cry very hard and pants heavily as the pain continues to plague his whole body. "Watashi-…….I didn't deserve to die!" Tears flow down his cheeks and drops on his jeans as it soaks through. " Doushite?...DOUSHITE?!?!..." He takes of his cat ears, looks at them as it symbolizes him as a shinigami, a prisoner of death, a servant retrieving souls from innocent people who did not have the will to die as he had. Takuto throws his hat far away from him to throw away his humiliation.…………"Mitsuki…….I don't want you to die….I won't let you!...You can't give up your dreams now….I don't want you to make the same regrets as I had when I was alive……Live with your whole heart, Mitsuki…………Your voice is so beautiful and meaningful……"…Pain increases more on him that causes him to speak louder. "MITSUKI, PLEASE!!! LET YOUR DREAMS REACH TO THE STARS!! LET YOUR HEART SING OUT!!" He cries even more.………"Mitsuki………………………don't let your mother and father down………They both had the gift of music and they passed it onto you……..even to me……Don't let that go away!...Mitsuki-chan……I promise that I will protect you no matter what……..I want to sing with you!!...and…………….I will always…………...…l-love-.."_

_Suddenly, a soft, feminine voice appears……"Takuto?..."_

_Takuto gasps and turns around and sees a 12 year old girl stand before him. Mitsuki stands on the rooftop next to him, holding his cat hat in her hands.…………Takuto's navy blue eyes gaze at her as he pants slowly, then his pain suddenly disappears.……………………"M-……………….Mitsuki…………"_


End file.
